All torn up

One thing continues to bother me! One thing has always been such a desire of mine! But it is one thing I cannot seem to do right now. My heart has always been, not just broken but drawn toward all the children that do not have families! Yeah, I know, you probably think about it for just a second...move on, and dont realy give it a second thought! You say to yourself "awe that is so sad that they dont have a family, or......." but for some reason I get completely torn up about it! Yesterday I was looking at the adoption list of kids just from around here and then onto kids around the US and if I could financially support them, if I had a big enough home, and if I had a vehicle to get them around in I think I would bring some more kids to a part of, not just our family but our church family! But for now I will just pray for these children, that God will bring people into their lives to touch them and that he will give them a family to call thier own!

"God in Control"

Yesterday was a horrible day! One of the most emotionally exhausting days I've had in a while! Although I didn't feel extremely stressed, I was emotionally drained! And today......I'M FEELING STRESSED! I know my source, and it is greater than any other! I know everything will be fine, but that doesn't keep the tears from falling, not out of grieving a loss, but because of "CHANGE."
Losing complete control in your life brings you to a place where you are completely opened up and reliant on "The One and Only," he is trustworthy, loves you, he is almighty, and will never leave you, "God."
Ultimately that is what he wants of us anyway! Nothing standing between you and him! Nothing that separates your love and affection to him!
So today although I feel as though things are so bad, deeply I know that we have been drawn in closer to "him" today. For that I am blessed beyond anything.

Well so here's the big news! Michael and I will be having our 4th child and hopefully our last(I believe God determines that.) This was a planned pregnancy although some people might think we are crazy that is what we decided would to do. We are very excited and praying for a boy although God knows what is best so ultimately we will be happy either way!

Tulips!

Well today everyone is stressed! Which means we all get to tip toe around the tulips. Actually we only tip toe around the tulips when Pastor Trudy is stressed and well..............she is stressed and aggravated. What's that saying "when momma ain't happy ain't nobody happy," in this case when Pastor Trudy ain't happy ain't nobody happy! LOL! Love you friend!

Attitudes

Yeah so I don't have a lot to say other than I get incredibly frustrated when people choose to walk away from what they know God has told them to do! Careful with the decisions that are made follow your Holy Spirit nothing else! Everything else can be deceitful!

Actually here's another one! Disrespect! Don't ever expect anyone to respect you unless you have respect yourself! Don't ever think yourself so great that everyone else is smaller than you and that giving you the right to walk upon other people! That boils down to not having respect for others and what they might be doing!

Good Moods!

You know I feel great today! I'm trying to figure out why! Well it's probably because I am working at the church with the coolest people in the whole world! Yeah that even made me laugh! I realy think its because I'm so Thankful for everyone in my life; I have the best friends any one could ever want, awesome husband, great family, 3 lil girls that keep me sooo busy all the time but then they smile and I just don't seem to care any more that I never sit down unless I'm at work. So Thank you to everyone for making my life wonderful, but the real Thanks goes to the one who gave me life!

The Firsts

Well, we made it through Christmas! It was hard! All the "firsts" after loosing someone are always hard but God has certainly blessed us in these hard times. My brother preached on Sun. and his sermon was "God's Grace is Enough for Me" and I have to agree. This tragedy in our life has brought back so many old feelings that I experienced when my mother was killed and you know I didn't understand anything when my mom passed but now as I look back on all the chaos
and confusion I was experiencing then and now having to walk thru it again I can see that God has been there carrying me thru all of it. Even though it may hurt like everything sometimes, I have to say God's Grace is Enough for Me!!!!!!!